Division one
Gentleness beckons
existential filth for
Her filth
Her gentleness
Postponed
Gentleness unknown
Filth unknown
Quiet gentleness when
Her quiet filth seeps in
Rocking gentleness seeks
To and fro filth
Sky blue gentle fill
Glaring pink filth on top
Abject gentleness
Abject filth
Lazy coiling gentleness
Stinking Sunday filth witheld
(Check coupon for details)
Passive aggresion
versus
I love you
Late kick off
Unfailing gentleness
Unfailing filth
Rire Plus
Common as muck she sparkled
In the back of a green transit van
Breathless as i tunes was shuffling
From Morrisey through to Chopin
Knocked up in that lay-by by Streatham
Named her baby Sweet Charity Hope
Then busked for two years down in Newquay
Reading tarot and selling some dope
Now she lives on a barge by Devizes
She's christened it Live Your Life More
But weeps whilst her cancer advances
Charity stares through the crack of the door
Cry
I would
If I thought
It would do any good
If I thought
I'd be any good
Or look any good
If I thought
My face being wet
May in some way
Improve my day
Forget
My eyes being red
My nose being thick
May in some way
Do the trick
Soft Boiled Eggs
The soft boiled eggs
I ate in childhood
Their felt tipped smiles
Promising alchemy
Line up now
Roll called
Stern faced
Carrying hatchets
Day Return
Shall I take a day return
To a cupboard in school
Safe at the back
Of the history block
With some moths
With some maps
And those mops
Call Girl
I could just call a call girl
Call her Juliet or Mary
I could sit and do the crossword
She could cook a Coq au vin
She could drive me to the airport
Wave her hanky on some jetty
A white flicker on the shoreline
Seagulls tangled in her hair
The South Shields Arthur Lowe
My brother's gone to battle
With the bloke who lives next door
He plans from his conservatory
He's read The Art of War
A Field Marshall in the making
He's an arsenal in his shed
Bought from B and Q and Homebase
He's that one step ahead
He's got super trooper spotlights
Which he's had passed by the planners
And twelve foot panelled fencing
His wife's a bag of spanners
He's got noisy windmill mobiles
They whirr and whine throughout the night
A Green Mountain Sugar Maple
Blocking out his neighbour's light
He cuts the lawn whilst naked
With his petrol powered mower
Has bonfires in the daytime
He's a Rambo Percy Thrower
It's a suburban moral minefield
The darkest Michael Bentine show
His tank's a people carrier
He's The South Shields Arthur Lowe
It's not like he's a moron
His head's a hothouse of ideas
He's on Operation Beehive
This may well go on for years
Inheritance
My father was magnanimous
So left me in his will
With good prostate cancer prospects
And a Black and Decker drill
Stanivlasky Meets Matalan
Community theatre is a farce
Led by the educated class
Who gull the aimless disengaged
Then set them up upon some stage
Oblivious of Bertholt Brecht
Whose needs are really being met
Sunday Tandem Love
Sweet couples
Riding tandems
Make no sense to me
Flaunting their togetherness
It's co-dependency
Their pedalling in unison
Makes them a tour de force
But Sunday tandem love to me's
Just heading for divorce
The Ghost in My Pig Sty
I thank you
For your quiet screams
I scarcely hear you
For your rare and gentle
Furtive flitting
Room to room
I have no need to lie wide eyed
Await awake
In fear the dark
The cracking on my door
Your stick
Is gone
So why still
Hover in the hall
Bouquet in hand
Localised
Somehow solemn
Maybe sitting on the tiles
Taxi Driver
Silent in the car
Ferrying me
Silent at the lights
From A to B
Silent in your car
Ferrying me
Silent in your lights
From A to B
Druids
Druids
You get on my tits
With your standing stones
Your sacred bones
Pendragon clones
Daft dream catchers
Hairy thatches
Animistic
Polytheistic allegories
Penchant for cloaks
And ancient oaks
Doing your rounds
On your burial mounds
Are you having a laugh
With your willow staff
Your Herbal teas and remedies
Celtic crosses
Fucking tossers
Ashes To Ashes
We could drive a bus
Through a Pinter pause
If we ever felt the need
You could sit there
Calmly counting
One
Two
Three
Death of a Salesman
Woolworth's six foot under
Black headscarves sift through town
Where will we buy our hula hoops
Or should we just stand still
Nearly Dead
Wet with sweat
My duvet stinks
Torn Lemsip sachets scattered
My bones all ache
My nostrils flake
My eyebrows are all matted
Dying
Being dead's dead easy
It's dying that's the drag
Death's a good night out I'd say
Though dying's not my bag
Ode to a Horse's Rump
Is it wrong to feel
A subtle twitch
A dirty itch
A raising brow
A stealing glance
A stirring in one's underpants
For fiery folds
Which have led
The horse to be a thoroughbred
Dead Friends
I've been asked around for dinner
To a party flung by ghosts
I murdered them some time ago
They're such neurotic hosts
Batty's Dead
Nora Batty's popped her clogs
The Yorkshire battle axe
On for nigh on forty years
Now she can relax
Edinburgh is Lesbos
Best friends hold hands
They both declared
On their weekend away
We know each other inside out
Don't dare suggest we're gay
Corner Bar
Who the hell is that
Holding up the traffic
Looking at the pictures
In last years Geographic
Bruce Cockburn; Kings' School Tynemouth 1985 (For Mark Fox)
Bruce straddled on the school desk
His crotch in Fox's face
Before the Act of 89
All kinds of things took place
You're saying this
(Two fingers wagging)
Sir I'm not
(Kegs filling)
Yes I am
(He change his mind)
Bypassing
Further grilling
The Wall is Hard
Martin fell whilst pointing
Face full into the wall
Wiser for his accident
Thought to advise us all
The Tufty Club
Someone's just been splattered
On the road outside
I cannot even leave the house
Police are everywhere
My car's part of the incident
There's 'matter' on the door
It was an older lady
I threw up when I saw
High Shelves
Staring back and bawling
I wonder why it changes shape
And if it's me it's calling
I never offer sympathy
This only fuels its rage
I cannot throw the thing away
I'll entertain a cage
Uncertain of its growing rate
Its temperament
Its health
I think it's best
To pick it up and place it on a shelf
I'll wrap it in crepe paper
I'll bind it with with brown string
I'll watch it pulse there silently
I'll open it come Spring
Dishes
Pile of dishes
Sitting
With your bad wishes
Knowing about
Me and the Mrs
Thanks
For fuck all
I'll come nowhere near
Your filth and grime
You don't deserve my time
I have more important things
To do
Dishes
Mung Beans
Fuck off vegetarians
With your butternut squashes
Your bland stroganoffez
Pasta bakes
Walnut cakes
Disdain for steaks
Ribs
Pork
Liver
Shanks
Smug moral wanks
Gently coasting
Blindly nut roasting
The Existential Fireman
The existential fireman
Flung freefell from his frown
Passing
Ladders
Hoses
Lies
Himself
Suspended
As a clown
Against The Odds
Glancing the Dodo
Downs Syndrome lives on
Swerving extinction
It's back in vogue
Standing at bus stops
Chequered pants and tank tops
Staring mid distance
Touching the stars
Fuji San
Divorce knocks the shit out of you
Divorce knocks that shit out of you
Divorce kicks the shit out of you
Tremors unknown
Blasting
Try to brake in the quake
As you break in the wake
Of it all
Friends revealed
Fieldwork
Squirrel warfare
Looks hard
Washing lines
Peanuts
Lard
Swung by your tail
At sixty five
To and fro
Oncology
All is not lost
On Ward Twenty Four
The trolley with casters
Parked by the door
I can't remember
Our names
Ode to Autumn
The sun shifted
As my father's cancer
Sideways
Flaring his marigolds
Carving an arc
Way across
The vegetable patch
Lifeboat Appeal
I hear that your mum
Hit a wall
In her head
The lifeboat appeal
That jar by her bed
Half empty
Less full
Dead
Hit a wall
In her head
The lifeboat appeal
That jar by her bed
Half empty
Less full
Dead
Mynah Bird
My brother bought a mynah bird
So put it in a cage
Returned it to the pet shop
Because it would not talk
Perhaps
It had nothing to say
You daft cunt
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